Photo credit: ambieandashiesart

“To thine own self be true”. Shakespeare didn’t have friends in need of bridesmaids when he came up with this genius quote.
Fresh from playing maid of honour to my dear cousin in July, & bridesmaid to a dear, dear friend before that, here we were on a fine Sunday morning in church in September & my “hello, hi’, friend was saying she needed me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding a few months from now. Well I wasn’t having it & said as nicely as I could that I was just a MOH a little over a month ago & I was done with bridal trains for now seeing as it was stressful & expensive & I couldn’t afford it at the moment, hope she didn’t mind & did she have a replacement? “Oh It’s fine”, she said. Well, that went well, I thought to myself, it wasn’t so bad right? Wrong!! Boy, was I wrong!
The Sunday after, in church, girl was giving me attitude. She wasn’t being glaringly rude but when we said hello she didn’t smile like she always did & walked past me talking over my head to my sister even though I was mid-sentence complimenting her dress. Surely, my imagination is running wild, I thought.
Fastforward to yesterday in church, walked past the girl & her mum on my way to a free seat on the same row of seats as them, said a cheery hello to her flashing my ‘colgate’ smile & a ‘goodmorning ma’ to her mum & they both responded with the most reluctant deep-in-the-throat grunt ever while looking straight ahead, stone-faced. Oh really now? They didn’t just grunt at me with their noses in the air! But it was clear as day that they did.
Will they get over it? I don’t know but the whole episode made me think how difficult it can be to be “true to thine own self” sometimes.
People get upset when you turn them down, not caring that the request came at a bad time for you. I’d much rather risk a few noses in the air & grunted greetings, thank you very much! than beat myself up later.
Did I mention I don’t plan to have a single bridesmaid at my wedding? Just a maid of honour. To me, it’s  more trouble than it’s worth, inconveniencing the poor girls, financially & otherwise & chasing after dresses.
A lot of us single ladies have had this bridesmaid blues episode, how did you handle it?


9 thoughts on “BRIDESMAID BLUES

  1. Haha,most times people think about themselves and what they want before any consideration for others. Helping out is quite satisfying but not at the risk of one’s own joy flying out the window.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Honestly written piece. It is true that people do not understand our situation completely at times and just go by the half truth they know. But it is equally true that we expect others to understand our situation even when they are unaware of the whole truth. Had we revealed the hidden half truth…there would have been at least some chance for them to know and understand our situation. Even I misunderstood many of the people… expecting them to understand my hidden situation.
    Negating someone’s idea is not my intent. I just dropped my idea. Hope you do not mind me sharing my thoughts here.

    Stay Blessed!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. people really dont care about how you feel or the reason you turned them down,but at the end of it all,you own your life,you no one explanation for any decision you make.
    i detest it and i dont know why people grumble when you turn them down,should you satisfy someone at your own detriment?hell no…my watchword for pityparty for anybody.


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